Why do patrons get so defensive when we catch them viewing pornography and ask them to leave? The Boss stood less than three feet behind such a patron today for a full two minutes before the patron even realized. When he did, he wasn't too happy. "WHAT?! Can I not download music?!" Well, that's illegal and is concerning, but those hardcore videos you were fastforwarding through are the reasons why you won't be coming back here.

Another patron recently came to the circulation desk with this riddle: "I need to watch a video, but I don't know the title of it."

Hummmm...

"Although, I do know that the title is something clever about flowers."

Ohhh! OK then.

- Circ. Ass.