Why do patrons get so defensive when we catch them viewing pornography and ask them to leave? The Boss stood less than three feet behind such a patron today for a full two minutes before the patron even realized. When he did, he wasn't too happy. "WHAT?! Can I not download music?!" Well, that's illegal and is concerning, but those hardcore videos you were fastforwarding through are the reasons why you won't be coming back here.
Another patron recently came to the circulation desk with this riddle: "I need to watch a video, but I don't know the title of it."
Hummmm...
"Although, I do know that the title is something clever about flowers."
Ohhh! OK then.
- Circ. Ass.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Thursday, May 8, 2008
We have several study rooms available in our library for groups to study, or just individuals who need the serenity of their own room with the ability to shut a door. In a number of those rooms, we provide dry erase boards. That means, of course, that we have dry erase markers and erasers available at the circulation desk to use on those boards.
Today, a patron gave me his ID as collateral for a marker. He didn't like the fact that we only had the color red available, but accepted it anyway. He asked, "Is it dry?" Before I could answer, he took the cap off of the marker and drew on the mousepad for the computer on the circulation counter. What are you doing, dude?
- Circ. Ass.
Today, a patron gave me his ID as collateral for a marker. He didn't like the fact that we only had the color red available, but accepted it anyway. He asked, "Is it dry?" Before I could answer, he took the cap off of the marker and drew on the mousepad for the computer on the circulation counter. What are you doing, dude?
- Circ. Ass.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Today, a patron tried to check out headphones using a fake ID. With Halle Berry's picture on it.
When we check out books to patrons, we always verbally inform them of the due date (even though it's printed on the bookmark). The other day, I noticed that the due date was May 5th. I told a patron his book was due back on Cinco de Mayo and he issued a bewildered, "HUH?!" I guess that's not really that weird, but this dude had no idea.
- Circ. Ass.
When we check out books to patrons, we always verbally inform them of the due date (even though it's printed on the bookmark). The other day, I noticed that the due date was May 5th. I told a patron his book was due back on Cinco de Mayo and he issued a bewildered, "HUH?!" I guess that's not really that weird, but this dude had no idea.
- Circ. Ass.
Monday, April 21, 2008
Not exactly the most insane question, but certainly an uncommon one:
"What's the warmest part of the library?"
It's going to be in the 80s outside today, so we may have had the air conditioner on to compensate, but it's definitely not chilly in the library. He asked very nonchalantly and seemed confused at my confusion when I didn't hear him the first time/asked for clarification.
- Circ. Ass.
"What's the warmest part of the library?"
It's going to be in the 80s outside today, so we may have had the air conditioner on to compensate, but it's definitely not chilly in the library. He asked very nonchalantly and seemed confused at my confusion when I didn't hear him the first time/asked for clarification.
- Circ. Ass.
Monday, April 14, 2008
Yet again
First printer patron of the day...
The first printer patron just came by. He asked me to help him log on to the print station where he was trying to retrieve documents. I approach the station and leave the password field blank, since there isn't one, and the patron then informs me that he has already tried several different passwords to no avail. After three unsuccessful attempts, our system locks out the user.
Thanks, jerk! I'm glad you moved the keyboard that we hid behind the monitor. I'm glad you decided to try your own zany password combinations to logon with, rather than just ask me first. We don't need people as smart as you to lock up our system. Now it's out of order and everyone else's print job has to be transferred.
Not long afterwards, another patron approached me asking where the other copier was because the one he was next to was out of order. That was actually the print station that was out of order, thanks to the first guy. I asked if he meant the printer. He answers with a yes, so I showed him the other printer. He thanked me, but still seemed confused. I then asked if he was going to use it to make copies of the magazine he was holding and he again said yes. I referred him to the copiers, not the printers. I wasn't sure how to explain the difference, seeing as he got himself into the situation of not knowing in the first place.
- The Boss
The first printer patron just came by. He asked me to help him log on to the print station where he was trying to retrieve documents. I approach the station and leave the password field blank, since there isn't one, and the patron then informs me that he has already tried several different passwords to no avail. After three unsuccessful attempts, our system locks out the user.
Thanks, jerk! I'm glad you moved the keyboard that we hid behind the monitor. I'm glad you decided to try your own zany password combinations to logon with, rather than just ask me first. We don't need people as smart as you to lock up our system. Now it's out of order and everyone else's print job has to be transferred.
Not long afterwards, another patron approached me asking where the other copier was because the one he was next to was out of order. That was actually the print station that was out of order, thanks to the first guy. I asked if he meant the printer. He answers with a yes, so I showed him the other printer. He thanked me, but still seemed confused. I then asked if he was going to use it to make copies of the magazine he was holding and he again said yes. I referred him to the copiers, not the printers. I wasn't sure how to explain the difference, seeing as he got himself into the situation of not knowing in the first place.
- The Boss
Despite the lack of updates, there has been no shortage whatsoever of insanity at our library... Including a patron who was recently accosted by police for allegedly viewing child pornography on our computers.
PDFs have a tendency to lock up our printers, so we have signs asking students not to print them. This hasn't deterred some mystery patron who keeps trying to print PDFs, naming each print job with a different expletive. Once they actually named a print job, "Chris's *explicitive deleted*" (including the bad spelling). At least he's censoring himself now.
So I decided to illustrate some of my favorite patron moments! These pictures bare no resemblance to any particular customers.
This picture demonstrates the average patron's tunnel vision. We have giant signs everywhere, indicating the locations of the circulation desk, elevators, copy center, and library assistance desk. Apparently some people only have the ability to rotate their heads from side to side and not up and down.
In some cases, the sign is even at eye level with the patron. This picture illustrates a patron situation from earlier this morning, when a woman wanted to return a book. She began to leave it on the countertop, so I asked her just to slide it into the book drop slot. There's a sign display right above the book drop with a large, red arrow showing patrons where to return their materials. She was looking right over the sign at me and still had no idea what I was talking about. Those were a frustrating few seconds.
It's also awesome when patrons who have never been to the library before ask for books on a particular subject, then ask how to find those books and walk away from the circulation desk when you're in the middle of explaining. They usually then call from the library assistance phone for someone to come find their books for them.
- Circ. Ass.
PDFs have a tendency to lock up our printers, so we have signs asking students not to print them. This hasn't deterred some mystery patron who keeps trying to print PDFs, naming each print job with a different expletive. Once they actually named a print job, "Chris's *explicitive deleted*" (including the bad spelling). At least he's censoring himself now.
So I decided to illustrate some of my favorite patron moments! These pictures bare no resemblance to any particular customers.
This picture demonstrates the average patron's tunnel vision. We have giant signs everywhere, indicating the locations of the circulation desk, elevators, copy center, and library assistance desk. Apparently some people only have the ability to rotate their heads from side to side and not up and down.
In some cases, the sign is even at eye level with the patron. This picture illustrates a patron situation from earlier this morning, when a woman wanted to return a book. She began to leave it on the countertop, so I asked her just to slide it into the book drop slot. There's a sign display right above the book drop with a large, red arrow showing patrons where to return their materials. She was looking right over the sign at me and still had no idea what I was talking about. Those were a frustrating few seconds.
It's also awesome when patrons who have never been to the library before ask for books on a particular subject, then ask how to find those books and walk away from the circulation desk when you're in the middle of explaining. They usually then call from the library assistance phone for someone to come find their books for them.
- Circ. Ass.
Friday, April 4, 2008
First copier patron of the day...
I hear "hey, buddy!" coming from the copy center, but I don't react. I'm not sure I feel that "hey, buddy!" is a correct way to initiate a conversation with someone that you need help from. I do understand that it's casual Friday, but I'm not your buddy.
"Sir?" Now that's better. I get up and ask how I can help.
Patron: "Umm..." He's holding a blank piece of paper, turning it over and over as if looking for the hidden side where our copier prints. "The printer just printed a blank page. I put the original in correctly." He lifts the lid and shows me the placement of the original.
I wanted to tell him that the copier is just mad because he keeps calling it a printer.
The original only had about five lines printed on it and he had placed it in the very middle of the glass. Well, anyone who uses a copier knows (and anyone who can pay attention to boldly printed instructions on the copier itself) that the original should always be placed in the upper left hand corner. I move the original to where it belongs, point to the pictures and words that explain the proper placement and walk off.
Patron, in a defeated tone: "I guess I will get another ten cents. Hold on."
Refunds are reserved for those that deserve it. There is no excuse for ignorance and certainly no excuse for cocky ignorance. ("I put it in right." Yeah, sure ya did.)
- The Boss
"Sir?" Now that's better. I get up and ask how I can help.
Patron: "Umm..." He's holding a blank piece of paper, turning it over and over as if looking for the hidden side where our copier prints. "The printer just printed a blank page. I put the original in correctly." He lifts the lid and shows me the placement of the original.
I wanted to tell him that the copier is just mad because he keeps calling it a printer.
The original only had about five lines printed on it and he had placed it in the very middle of the glass. Well, anyone who uses a copier knows (and anyone who can pay attention to boldly printed instructions on the copier itself) that the original should always be placed in the upper left hand corner. I move the original to where it belongs, point to the pictures and words that explain the proper placement and walk off.
Patron, in a defeated tone: "I guess I will get another ten cents. Hold on."
Refunds are reserved for those that deserve it. There is no excuse for ignorance and certainly no excuse for cocky ignorance. ("I put it in right." Yeah, sure ya did.)
- The Boss
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)